A Study of Hummus – The Boring Stuff

Some Basics


The [goo aliens] currently have three homeworlds – too developed to be colonies – in a single solar system. Calcaeia rocky planet with a moon that once so bright it competed with the system’s star frequently. Weltra, a rocky planet with a stunningly complex set of rings, and Iu’husid, a thick-atmosphered ringed planet tilted on its side. Due to this, public clocks are usually in sets of three – they look very similar to Arc clock designs.

They seem to use floating point math a lot – that is, a number between 0 and 10 base 12, and an exponent. If this is common off the ship… is unknown.

The ship has three Counselors – Science (Grerbe), Harvesting, and Navigation. 

The Science counselor is responsible for the studies abord the ship. The Harvesting counselor is responsible for provisioning – asteroid mining for restocking, life support systems, and the recycling systems. The Navigation counselor Is responsible for the integrity of the ship and astronavigation. Navigation is the smallest group, and Havesting is the largest group, but crew can be resigned depending on needs and qualifications.

An order issued by a counselor can be overridden by the order of two counselors, which can be overridden by a vote of the crew. Grerbe’s order kicking Ken’di out of Navigation was not overridden.

The [Ship Name] is a short hop jumper, a short hop being a light year or three, depending on space weather. 

A small probe is sent to the desired arrival point, about a week before a jump, to confirm the destination point is “safe”. it then magnetically clears interstellar hydrogen that the ship could bump into when it warps. It’s not 100% effective clearing the area – so this week is also used for repairs of the main ship as required. After the main ship jumps, the process is repeated. The last jump, next to a solar system, is the riskiest. Somthing recognizable as rockets then propel the ship to it’s intended destination.

It took 38 hops to get to Earth’s solar system. It’s not claified if this was a base10 or base12 number.

Most of the crew was in ‘sleeping pods’ during this trip. Normally being rudced to minimal hydration would lead to major aches and headaches, but these pods render the occupant comatose – with some redundances, and more importantly, manual escape mechanisims if somthing goes wrong.

During a jump, when the ship is traveling faster than light, light is still going the same speed. That is, it’s utterly dark. Profoundly dark. Hallucinate things you see in a cave dark. Sound still operates normally. So it’s only well trained navigation crew that are awake for this, in rotating shifts.

Grerbe, insisting on privacy, had a pod away from the rest of the crew… and was distracted by her own thoughts during the emegency escape training.  She experienced a jump. Ken’di was the one that found out her state afterewards… and bore the brunt of the blame. As a counselor, Grerbe remained dedicated to the mission – but this experince allowed the failures to “snowball”. She isn’t the leader she could have been.

The ship itself has artifical gravity, but was retrofitted with two huge toruses for living and working space. These toruses aren’t equipped with artifical gravity generators – rather, the ship spins along it’s length to throw it occupants on the toruses’ outer walls. Like gravity throws you on the dirt. Except they can stop the ships spinning should the need arise.

The War, and Afterward


13 gross before the first Chime of Peace, there was the end of a dark age. It’s believed it was due to an almost universally spread parasite. This parasite caused widespread “natual” division, which does nothing to preserve memories. Imagine a society that has barely had to see deal with kindergartners suddenly overrun with babies. High mortality rates, locales suddenly going practically feral. Massive loss of knowledge, high mortality rates.

The end came with refining older methods of controlled division to exclude the parasite, and widespread treatment. Recovery… was slow. Governments evolved along Feudal lines.

The masses were ignorant, a few argued. It was merited.

Kingdoms weren’t entirely consolidated before the rediscovery of space travel. Enough knowledge had been lost that the kingdoms of the two planets had little authoritative answer which was the original. Language drift hadn’t helped.

The war between the planets started as a minor resource war.

The authoritarian dictators of each made a very limited access democracy among themselves in mutual defense; it was a long buildup, and then an exponentially hard attack.

An initial colony had already been planted on the third planet. Realizing what they had just done by following orders, reducing their planets to another dark age, the two planetary space navies called a truce- which led to their leaders denying them a home harbor. The minimally populated third planet’s orbit was the only one left to take them in.

Some forces, once the proper armies disbanded, tried to teraform the planet to their needs. They succeeded, at great cost of life. Others tried to adapt their race to the new planet- they succeeded, at great cost of life, making the equivalent of their ubermensch.

One of these was Grerbe’s ancestor.

Eventually they decided the only way they would survive long term was with the resources of their home worlds.

The authoritarians – the few left intact after the destruction of their planets (as they had the the deepest bunkers) – were strategically assinated, and the now three world government slowly restored the worlds to working order.

The chime of peace was first sounded at the official end of this effort.

It’s sounding, in effect, notified near by solar systems of their presence, and started a renaissance in trade and culture.

The Jump drive, or the underpinnings of it, was not a slime alien invention. But it was their understanding of optics that made it workable – their trading partners were now a relatively safe jump or three away, instead of hundreds.

However there was still the maxim of space exploration- if you go looking for something where you see nothing, you’ll just find empty space

Earth was far too distant from this homeworlds for our radio transmissions to make any sense. But. The patterns that did leak through interstellar space were worth following up on.

Mind you, the chime was more powerful than anything Earth has broadcast.

SETI is freaking out right now.

They just don’t know where to look.

Subspecies, but not Really


CalcaeiWeltra, and Iu’husid can all be said to have a subspecies of the slime race. Really though, since there isn’t any sexual reproduction, these are mostly visual and cultural characteristics.

Calcaei slimes are the lightest blue. It’s been suggested this is because the higher amount of solar radiation.

Weltra slimes are slightly darker, frequently with localized purple patches. The frequently sport two pairs of tendrils – or tentcles, if you prefer – in addition to whatever limbs they are currently utilizing – this is more a widespread social convention. If a Calcaei slime moves to Weltra, it ususally takes two generations for their ofsping to be indistingusable from the locals, with definately noticable traits in the first generation in transition. The same for the opposite direction.

Iu’husid slimes are the darkest, reaching into navy blues. The are significantly larger than the others, on average. As their origins are engineered, they do not experience nearly the same transition as the other subspecies. Calcaei and Weltra slimes will darken further in subsequent generations, but will never get as dark as the Uber lines.

In “natural” reproduction, which has bilogical triggers, A parent slime “reformats” as it splits into multiple child slimes. This is why controlled reproduction is usually preferred – a controlled separation splits the memories of the parent between it’s offspring – some of WHICH memories are discovered as the child grows up. But it also has a bit less maturing to do – a controlled baby slime, if there’s enough mass to be viable, has the intelligence of a 6 year old human.

Yes, there is a good possibility some of the children will never “wake up”. It’s a greater chance in “natural” reproduction – and the more children the parent tries to have.

Controlled separation has, at times, been used as an alternative to the death penalty.

Among most, wanting to go through natural reproduction is seen as worse than wanting yourself euthanized, because of the burden being placed on society. But every culture has a counterculture – natural birth communes feel like a mix of Amish communities and prison colonies. 

Adulthood is generally held as when a slime stops gaining organic mass. While water weight is a seperate thing – after a certain point it doesn’t matter how much is eaten, the food just processes less efficiently. Adult mass can vary rather significantly, even among a single set of sisters.

Mass and intelligence are not directly related. However, a significant los of mass once a slime has reached adulthood is the equivelent of brain damage. They can learn to live around it, but there’s no way they’re getting back to their original organic mass.

A not too Complicated Relationship with Water


Slime biology is a little like antifreeze – At a 50/50 mixture with water, it’s at its most effective.

Less water and, unless other measures have been taken, severe headaches and muscle aches can result. One notable scenario where sever dehydration is acceptable is in a jump ship’s sleep pods: other chemicals keep the occupant unconscious, and the smaller profile means reduced risk of encountering dark place radiation. Whatever that is. Look, everything’s pitcher-black-than-a-cave dark when your ship is going faster than the speed of light. You need very good desensitization training if you’re going to be awake for that.

Somewhere between 47% and 54% hydration is normal. And extremely easy to maintain on the homeworlds. They are humid places. So on a space ship that can rust an corrode, you wear more waterproof clothes and remember where the drinking fountain is.

More water and… well, those that do that regularly are generically known as water sluts.

A good chunk of that subculture behaves sort of like extreme bodybuilding subcultures – they are pumping and trying to make it look effortless. The more water content, though, the less natural control one has. Technique is important.

Nobody on the ship intentionally pushes past the point of no control – that WAS a disqualifier because of the risks it entailed – but some people back on the homeworlds, yes. It is completely possible for a slime alien to dissolve irrecoverably in a large enough body of water – you will never find a slime wanting to go for a swim.

“But what if I let the pool evaporate completely and-” look. Protein has a shelf life. And even if slime alien’s arent based off cells as humans know them, beleive me, humans are in many ways more resilaint than slimes. Humas are just more alergic to sharp objects and crushing.

Internal Politics


Humans, please be advised all numbers in this section are in “base 12”, as they would be more readily recognized by most of the crew, and not (base 10), as would be more recognized by humans. Both will be given when I can be bothered to.

The Crew of Short Jump Ship 3, when departing on what would become known as The Hummas Expedition [to Planet Earth], was a full contingent of 100 (144).

The usual command structure was maintained, adapted to the expedition; Science, Harvesting, and Navigation. Under the initial hierarchy plan, each division had 40 (48) members, including their respective Counselors.

The sturcture was altered even before the ship arrived in the solar system of Earth; In response to a malfunction of the Counselor of Science’s sleep pod, One of Navigations’ engineers was reassigned to Harvesting, being called a “demotion”.

As the mission progressed – and it was determined that the Denizens of Earth were not ready for a first contact,  The Counselor of Navigation, her anticipated purpose during the mission being thwarted, fell to depression. While this was eventually treated as well as the sips resources allowed, many of her duties and charges fell to the Counselor of Navigation, as the counselor of science was non-military and did not have appropriate logistical management skills.

Essentially, a single shift of the bridge crew reported only to Navigation. It’s believed the number fell as low as B (11).

Another negative factor was the continuation of the policy of maintaining bipedal form while in the public space. This was justified by the fact that there was communication with mind-printed human guests (based on Jaqui process). While some of the crew voiced no opposition to this sort of extended immersion, a large contingent of the Harvesting department spent considerable time searching for options to defy the spirit but not the letter of the order. While some attempts were made to reduce such opposition – like excepting a ‘garden’ space from the order – by that point it had became part of life on the ship.

It should be noted, productivity was never expected to be high during this mission, it was only the determination of group based leadership and individuals that kept the mission viable for it’s revised length. The one possiblity for open rebellion, during the 4th Human subjects print viability, was met by opposition from all parties.

Addendum: Counselor of Science

Oh sure, Peyde rallies the troops against impossible odds. And we both know you were happy to “take on the responsibility” if it got you a promotion later.



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